Joe Hager

05 Feb 2009

Musical taste requires no analysis or routine

Conversations and interactions I’ve had with my peers during my 4 million years as an undergrad have left me with an unsettled feeling toward the state of music. On one hand, the state of music production has never thrived quite […]

11 Dec 2008

Craigslist offers more than simple items for purchase

Whoever Craig is, he has invented what might be the most interesting list-based Web site on the Internets today: craigslist.com. I have not the tiniest photon of doubt that my venerated readers have visited or at least heard of this […]

04 Dec 2008

Economy’s recession may hinder Santa’s gift giving

This year, Santa may find himself in a thorny position. The recent stock market crash -- one of the biggest in the history of our nation -- has undoubtedly put Santa’s massive manufacturing operation on the tightest budget in years.

20 Nov 2008

Better turkey treatment for tastier meals

This year, the oxymorons over at People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals are calling for ALL turkeys to be pardoned, a drastic and unprecedented move that would result in a fraudulent “vegetarian Thanksgiving.” As a hot-blooded, meat-eating, quite handsome […]

13 Nov 2008

Few changes are required for an improved River Falls

A few weeks ago, our lovely columnist Teresa Aviles wrote about her experience in River Falls. She described some of the interesting, quirky places she’s discovered around town while going to school here. I recognized a few of her discoveries […]

06 Nov 2008

United States threatened by zombie apocalypse

As a nation, we are in a time of worry. There’s a lot to fret about these days, I think everyone is well aware of our dire situation so I won’t digress with an alphabetical list which would no doubt destroy this column’s 500-word limit.

30 Oct 2008

Life’s reality hidden by lack of challenges

You know, it’s a real shame I’ve never been shot or stabbed. I’ve never had a life-threatening addiction or even gotten in a legitimate fight. I’ve never broken my nose or been in a car accident.

23 Oct 2008

Letter to McCain reminisces when he was a real maverick

Dear Mr. McCain: It didn’t have to be this way, man. Here we are two weeks away from the end of your dying presidential campaign and I’d say you deserve a break.

16 Oct 2008

Social bookmarking sites open up the Internet

I’m happy I’m alive in 2008. I look at my time and place in history and I can’t help but appreciate the fact that I’ve experienced plenty of world-altering events. I’ve lived through what has arguably been the worst president in our nation’s history.

02 Oct 2008

Simple observation illustrates financial blunder affecting us

Do you realize how scary this year has been so far? We’re in the middle of the direst financial crisis since the Great Depression. The government is on the verge of spending $700 billion to bail out Wall Street. Just […]