Student Voice


June 16, 2024


Ask Kayla

November 7, 2014

Hello UW-River Falls students! My name is Kayla Donahue and I am a sophomore here on campus. I live and work in Grimm Hall as a Resident Assistant, and I started a new advice column right here in the Student Voice. Send me an email message at Explain your issue that needs resolving and sign it with an alias or your real name. Anonymity is completely up to you. You can submit topics for discussion from problems in the classroom to relationships with that special someone. I'm open to almost anything except for topics laced with profanity and pornography.

My ex-boyfriend and I are "friends with benefits." Whenever I go home, we end up sharing a bed together. I recently discovered that he and his ex-girlfriend might be getting back together, or have already gotten back together. I miss him as my boyfriend so much and I don't want to lose him -- especially to her. I also hate the fact that if they are back together, he is cheating on her with me. But I want him back so bad that I'm willing to look past it if it is true. I need help. -- Downward Spiraling Love Life

I would suggest asking your ex-boyfriend what is going on.

However, don't come off super jealous even though you probably are. You have the right to know what kind of guy you're sleeping with–ex or not. Tell him how you feel about him and the situation with his ex-girlfriend before you lay it all out on the line.

The longer you wait, the harder it's going to be. If he won't tell you–or he is cheating on her with you–he's isn't the one for you. You don't deserve someone who cheats: You deserve someone who will be faithful and appreciative towards you -- and solely you.

My dad passed away four years ago and he said to always look for the best in situations. And in the bad situations, look for what you gained from the experience. -- Kayla Lynch

I like the way you look at things. I am very sorry to hear that you lost your father. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have mine around. But I definitely agree, even though it may be hard to see something good in what you think is difficult.

There is always something to learn from every situation, good or bad. Thank you for sharing your view on life!

Kayla Donahue is a student at UW-River Falls.