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Opinion

Costume ideas help procrastinators save time, money

October 27, 2006

Halloween is coming up, and that means it’s time for some exhaustive soul searching to find what part of your inner self you want to finally reveal to the world -- or at least everyone else at the party.

Or maybe you just want to reveal what was left on the rack the day of the shindig, or maybe you just want people to see your hiney.

For some creative people, coming up with a costume idea is no problem. I, on the other hand, struggle for weeks trying to come up with an amazing costume, then barely come up with something borderline amazing.

The key is not to try too hard. I want to do a public service today and give everyone still unsure of what to wear some jumping off points. So go ahead, take these ideas and run wild with them. Hopefully you discover a costume idea that is beyond amazing.

Around a third of costumes, and that’s a rough guesstimate based on no statistics whatsoever, are portrayals of famous people or characters.

But you don’t have to be someone famous to have a righteous costume, just dress up as your favorite professor. Not only will people, who are familiar with that professor appreciate your costume, but those who were not before will be now and will definitely want to sign up for class with such a distinguished individual who inspired a Halloween costume. This is your chance to spread the word. Seize it, buy the high waters and wire-rimmed glasses.

Characters make great costumes, it’s true, but not all characters are necessarily a specific individual.

There’s the Disco Dude, the White Rapper, the Interpretive Dancer, the Lunch Lady. Everyday people can be interesting when you put your own special twist on them. Just think of people you see at the State Fair and run with it. I think it would be interesting to mix two completely different characters and come up with something, such as Goth Cowboy.

You’re probably thinking of so many costume ideas now that you need more parties to go to.
And don’t discount some of the mainstays, like a mummy costume -- great for ugly people -- and a witch, which actually requires a bit of ugly to really pull it off.

And no matter how many times people complain about how Halloween is an excuse for girls to dress like strippers, I’ m pretty sure there are many people -- guys -- who would be disappointed if this tradition stopped.

So on Halloween, girls will always dress a wee bit whorish, and guys use Halloween as an
excuse to dress up as women, so I guess we’ re all satisfying some secret fantasies this one night of the year.

If you are still completely stuck on what to wear this weekend when time runs out, just dress normally and have an arsenal of lines for the inevitable question, “Where is your costume?”

Just tell them you left it at their mom/dad/boyfriend/girlfriend’s house, and you’d appreciate it if they’d remember to give it back after they washed the caramel off.

Cassie Rodgers is a student at UW-River Falls.