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Opinion

MySpace merely adolescent angst

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September 28, 2007

“Whatchu gonna do with all them friends, all them friends that’s on your page,” the song begins. “I’m m-m-m-m-make them comment, make them comment on MySpace, MySpace … OMG (Oh My God) it’s MySpace, MySpace.” These lyrics, sung to the beat of “My Humps” by the Black Eyed Peas and written by two MySpace enthusiasts, tickle me.

My mother questioned me on this topic. “What is MySpace?” she asked after she read about the site in a magazine.

Looking beyond the absurdity of provocative self-taken photos, miserably used HTML, and meaningless comments, I would have responded: Well Mom, MySpace is a resourceful tool for a number of things. It’s a relatively simple way to keep in contact with those you don’t often see, and a community itself where you can find individuals who share similar interests. It’s an exceptional source for finding new film and music of practically any genre. There is even a classifieds section.

But I didn’t say that. When she asked, I was slightly ashamed to admit that I have a page. Aside from the tools I mentioned above, MySpace is juvenile.

“Teens are narcissistic and exhibitionist. For teens, especially, who are going through this stage where they’re constantly looking for that affirmation and validation and response for everything they are, it’s just addictive,” says Anastasia Goodstein, who publishes online news and commentary about Generation Y.

So instead I told her: MySpace is online community people use to make themselves look more profound and talented than they actually are. They title their blogs things like “A welcomed arrow through the heart.” They submit impeccably angled headshots of themselves though seldom do they look so exquisite in person. They spend hours filling out “surveys,” which investigate useless subjects such as if the individual can write with both hands, blow a bubble or impersonate someone. They comment insignificant babble on their supposed friends pages and end it with a heart icon. I even know a guy who has a gizmo that displays how many people are or have been romantically interested in him. It’s called a “Crush Count,” and yes, I added my name because I dated him for roughly four years.

Perhaps I was so mortified to explain MySpace because I am a former addict. I know this sort of addiction, if spread too widely, will ultimately be the doom of our nation. It is, however, still amusing and if you add me I’ll comment something brilliant on your page so everyone thinks you’re popular.

Annee Mayer-Chapleau is a junior studying creative writing. She loves astronomy and her main goal in life is to dance like David Byrne from the Talking Heads.